Mental Health

I’ve recently opened up about the fact that I’ve experienced mental health issues over the past twelve years. In the future I plan to write more about many different personal challenges and learning. My reasons for this are to help open the topic for conversation, provide some insight to myself, and to provide relief from isolation and be connected. I am not a medical professional. I am only able to speak of my experiences from the other side.
Today I’m starting with a list of some things I noticed about myself leading up to hospitalization.

What I noticed before hospitalization

– Severe difficulty concentrating

– Difficulty getting things done

– Intense feelings of stress

– Difficulty sleeping

– Delusional thoughts

– Lack of visible emotion and random out bursts of crying

– Eating very little

Experiences Immediately before hospitalization

– Mechanical movements and chewing

– Self harm

– Extremely delusional thoughts

– Not able to sleep

– Pacing

– Speaking very little

– A focus on good and evil

Factors that effected me

– Spending large amounts of time alone

– Trying to look strong while feeling broken

– Isolating myself emotionally by sharing little

– Keeping many limiting beliefs

– History of some mental illness in the family

– Feeling like I had to figure it out on my own and carry on